Scarlet, hugs... that sucks. Though some income sounds better than none for the moment? Hard to say from here of course...

LT, I'll just throw something out that my (hopefully soon ex-partner) says all the time and I still struggle with (he has Asperger's and from my impression it's pretty severe): if he'd say "why are you here" when I am in a room, he'd probably want to me to take it literally. I.e. why am I currently here, is there something that needs to be done? Not in a mean way at all, just what's going on kind of. Your D might also perceive some part of the house as "her hangout room" and then when you are there and there is no reason, maybe she wonders? I really, really struggle with just taking things literally when he says them, but most often, whatever he says is translated very literally to the situation and does not have any ill-intend at all. Of course I don't know whether it's the same for her.