Therapy later, and I hate to be this pessimistic but if I think it's going to help and it doesn't I'm going to come home and seriously hurt myself. I've probably only been "doing okay" behavior wise the past few months because I don't do shyt in therapy or expect anything good from my team anymore and cancel half the appointments they don't.

edit: Ha!!!!! That was PERFECT timing. She just called and cancelled love ittttttt