I'm feeling better than I was when I started this thread. My tree and Nativity set are up. They look nice. I feel fairly confident that I won't get into a bad state over the holidays. I am forcing myself to stay positive, which is kind of working.

I must not isolate. There are things going on that I can participate in - like a neighborhood Christmas party. Socializing does not come natural to me. I have to push myself . . . hard.

Thank you for the posts above. I feel less alone.