I know exactly what you're going through. I'm very bad at keeping my place up too. Piles of clutter and papers, can't find things, would take a major clean-up to find some things. It just gets to the point where it is now that it is so overwhelming, it paralyzes me. I just can't handle it, so I leave it. I know that's only going to make the situation worse if I don't do something, yet I can't seem to get past being paralyzed. I did have family members come offer to help me and to be honest that's what it would probably take cuz I don't even know where to start anymore, but thankfully they cancelled out for whatever reason, can't remember now. My superintendent came in here a couple of weeks back to do something with the plumbing, I had absolutely no warning. I was horrified and totally embarrassed. I NEVER allow anyone in here. It's not like I don't have the time to do it either cuz I'm home all day. I have no excuse. I know I need to be productive and get it done but it's just at the point that it would take me forever just to do one room and I would be too stressed out before I even started to get much done, so it probably wouldn't look any different for the effort I do put in. Even I am having a difficult time with 'managing' it now. Before I knew where things were even in this disarray but I can't honestly say that now. I had planned on at least cleaning off this desk today but the clutter still sits here. I really need help but I won't ask my family to help me, I'm too embarrassed. So sweetie, I know exactly how you're feeling. You're not alone. Oh, and I have two cats, so that makes matters worse, there always seems to be cat hair to clean up too. ugh!!! Funny you should bring this subject up now, I was just mentioning it to my T this week about how overwhelmed I am with it. She told me to just start at the top of each pile, one piece of paper at a time. Somehow, it just doesn't seem that easy for me. I can't get over how overwhelmed and paralyzing it all is. It's almost gotten to the point that I don't even notice it anymore so I don't think about it needing done until I find out somebody needs to come here and then it's a full fledged panic attack. To be perfectly honest, it was even extremely difficult for me to even post this because it's sooooooo embarrassing. I hate living like this and before I knew I was BP, I didn't live like this. This is not me, this is not the way I want to live but yet I feel too paralyzed to do much about it.