I've spent all day in my pajamas doing nothing. Just looking at stuff online. All I've eaten are pieces of candy that I got as a gift.

I know this is ridiculous. I'll feel tons better, if I just get up and do some stuff. I'm invited to something on Xmas eve that I'm really glad about.

Thank you, @Deejay14. You are so right. I live in a fairly mild climate. (It was in the 60s here today.) But I feel cold just because I'm not active enough to warm up. It's like I'm frozen. Yesterday, the only thing I did was get into a warm bubble bath. It seems all I want is to be in a cocoon - like the bed or the tub or the couch or the recliner. I don't even feel sad or depressed emotionally. I'm not sick. I just keep living in my head.

I will take a hot shower now and get dressed . . . even though the sun is setting now. The best thing I could do is make a plan this eve for exactly what I'm going tomorrow. Otherwise, I wake up with no concept of what to do next. So I roll over and go back to sleep, or I find a video to watch on my tablet.

I feel pretty hopeful that I can get into a much better space, if I push myself. Family called me this evening, which boosted my spirit. I appreciate the encouragement I get here. I realize now that my planning needs to be detailed. Before going to bed, I should pick out what I'm going to wear next day. I'll be more inclined to get out of the p.j.s, if I already have a picture of me dressed in my head.

I know my challenges are nothing compared to the real tough problems that people deal with every day. That's the craziness of chronically recurring depression. I actually was happier when I had real problems to solve every day. I'm retired, but currently in good health. I can do whatever I want most days. So I wake up and think of a hundred different, interesting things I could do. Then I can't make up my mind which thing to pick. Too many options make me dizzy. So I don't pick one, stay home, and do nothing, but vegetate. That leads to apathy and indifference, which eventually leads to real depression that is no joke.

Well, I'll post tomorrow that I did or didn't make a move in a good direction. This will help me be a bit more accountable, so I don't keep opting to just vegetate. Even if no one reads my posts, I need to read them. Still, I appreciate that anyone visits my thread. I am grateful that I'm not in some grievous predicament. If I look around at the problems some members here are grappling with, it reminds me to count my blessings.