I stayed up til 2:30am last night playing competitive Scrabble on my laptop, not just the casual way i've been playing on my phone lately. I thought i might get involved in it again. But by the light of day it didn't seem like a good idea. Too many obstacles. I often get unrealistic at night. I guess it was just that.

I tried a virtual social but didn't last long. Now i'm not so sure about the ones i have planned for Christmas and New Year's. I don't really have anything to say and i don't want to listen. There seems to be little reason to socialize. I preferred to lay on the sofa and listen to a random NPR broadcast online.

Off to bed in my clean bedding and clean nightgown!

@Blueberrybook:

That's great news about your mom! Such a good time of year to hear it.

@June08:

Hope your plan goes well! It makes good sense. You're lucky to be able to sit outside at this time of year. Here it is scary-cold.

@Scooter9:

Sorry to hear you're so depressed. You used to sound so keen and active about your recovery. I just want to be left alone too. You've got family to deal with, tho, where i get what i want. The famous American author Charles Bukowski wrote about he just wanted to be left alone too. It's a worthy desire.