Hugs, if wanted, CNS. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this and glad that Flipper is being supportive. I'm sorry the cops treated you poorly.

In terms of boundaries, I know this is maybe a bit different, but we're seeing a parenting therapist for help with D, and she (the therapist) is attending my daughter's IEP meeting next week (where we set goals and supports in school for special education for autism/intellectual disability). It's virtual anyway, but if it were in person, I think she'd travel to be there (we meet with her virtually, and she's about 50 minutes' drive from us/D's school). She said she's done this for numerous clients (and Dr. T has mentioned doing that as well, as he works with some teens, though with him being my individual therapist, I'd feel weirder having him go to D's meeting).

I feel it's a similar thing, a therapist going along for support. I know some therapists will also go to the hospital with a client and might wait with them there until they're seen or someone else comes to support them. Therapists will also make court appearances for clients. So I don't see it as a particular crossing of boundaries.

It would be different maybe if, say, he were coming to your home to talk to your partner. Or were letting you stay with him at his place till you could find someplace to stay. Though I could even see something like that as being OK, if it were to temporarily keep a client safe, if they had nowhere to go.