@ N P

These feelings aren’t "evil" or wrong but rather insights into your emotional world and your difficulty expressing these emotions might stem from a fear of vulnerability or rejection. Writing the letter, even if you feel conflicted about it, is a courageous step toward processing these emotions.

Your love for P can be seen not as something to be ashamed of but as a testament to the work you’ve done together. Endings in therapy though painful can be a profound space for growth if explored with openness and compassion.

Your T's responses, like recording his letter do suggest that he deeply valued the relationship and wanted to honor its importance to you. I'm glad he could provide you with something tangible to hold onto as you navigate this transition.