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Addiction and just straight up hating yourself in a specific harmful method?
I was talking to some guy that said "I kinda wanna drink, but I don't want to slip up."
My thinking is "I want to **** everything up, so I'm gonna drink."
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"I don't know what I'm looking for."
"Why not?"
"Because...because...I think it might be because if I knew I wouldn't be able to look for them."
"What, are you crazy?"
"It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet,"
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