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Jan 08, 2025, 12:40 PM
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Member Since: Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 25,077
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cutman2000
I remember wanting to leave my wife due to feeling ostracized by her. But I just didn't/don't have anyone else. I have no real connections with my siblings, family or any real friends(I do have one longtime friend(widower) in another state back home). Outside of the few females that I talk with from the dating sites, and one long time friend(widower) that lives in the state back home I don't really talk to anyone.
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The thing is, you don't need to have someone else to leave. You are better off leaving with no one else because then you have time to figure out the things that went wrong in you & your wife & learn from the bad situation so you don't just jump into another bad situation. It gives you time to get control of your own life & learn what works & doesn't work without having someone in your life controling how you act/react again.
I had a lifetime (54 years) of living with dysfunctional parents & husband that created a lot of dysfunctional behaviors in myself. Ya gotta clean up your own crap so that you know what you are willing to tolerate in life after that & not fall right back into your own dysfunctional lifestyle again & learn nothing from our past.
I only have my daughter & she lives halfway across the country. Learning to be independent & strong is a good thing because then you don't just let anyone into your life, you can be selective & you will end up a lot happier in the end.
Personally after 21 years with dysfunctional parents & 33 years in a bad marriage, these last 17 years alone starting off in a new town where I knew no one was a blessing. I could focus on therapy & healing. I now have quality friends I can choose when I want to be social or not, I am financially independent even though I only have SS to live on. I am responsible for myself & that feels really good after living around dysfunction all my life. Have never been happier than the last 17 years living alone with my animals on my little farm.
Don't limit yourself with limiting thinking. Life can be really good if you actually give it a chance.....& I say that after actually trying to end my life many times the last 13 years of my marriage. Finally when opportunity opened the door to leave....I RAN & never looked back & have never been happier even when challenges have hit
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Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
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