Welcome!

The following is a generalization and not meant to disparage anyone... But you did write, "I get some sort of retaliation or put down by women" emphasis added.

As a guy, I sometimes get accused by women of man-'splaining, so I think I can relate to your situation. As well, my understanding is that when a woman talks about a problem, she's not asking for a solution; rather she's just venting and expecting either empathy or commiseration.

But men, in general, are problem solvers. We start talking about how to fix the problem. We don't do empathy. We're from Mars, after all...

Okay, let's see those flamethrowers...