My therapist wants to work on me feeling safe. I don't see it happening. I've been the monster and seen to many monsters to know anyone can be a monster at any time but she says it's a trauma thing. I'm sorry you never feel safe, it's tiring. There was a new med Cobenfy can you try that? There's so many things being studied right now. I have hope for you. Keep going please. You are cared about and loved.