Spoke to a guy today from my support group on text. We spoke about studying. He needed a study partner and I offered to help. Then he said he would like to meet me. I said no, I have a strict policy not to meet a man alone. So I told him I am available on text since I dont trust easily. He said “Well I hope you will share with me over time , I would very much like you opening up. I don't like someone feeling lonely no one should suffer.” But then when I shared some of my troubles in studying, and with peers, he said “Why do you bother? I will help you, are you so empty to care about what others think? Dont strut, loosen up a bit.” I said that I am uncomfortable with that type of language. He said, “You vaguely understood what I meant. But either way I'm also uncomfortable with someone who barely can interpret what I am saying.” I replied, “Saying “are you so empty” even with good intentions can cause someone a lot of hurt.” He said “I didn't mean it that way. Why do I want to remotely even hurt you, When you were saying some emotional distressed situation ?“ then i said “Even though you didnt want to hurt me, what you have said has hurt me, so I will end the conversation here.” And blocked him.
Some other details: I joined this group on 29th december 2024. I have not interacted with this person since before a week, because he joined the support group very recently. It is for general mental health, physical health and the group is led by a counsellor. The troubles I experienced was that I feel I have good study skills, but my progress is so slow that I feel quite left out, compared to my classmates. I did not appreciate being asked to meet so casually for a walk when I dont know him. He said “chill lady!” As well, when I said I had a lot of pressure to study. After blocking him I felt that this was the exact response I didnt like. When he asked, why do you bother? I felt like saying my wish! I will get bothered if I want to. I will suffer if I want to. I will cry if I want to. I feel shy to report this to the admin because she had prohibited direct messages. But this I felt was an exception because I thought its just as a study buddy anyway. Plus if people dont tell me why a rule is made, it wont be easy for me to follow it. I need to be told the consequence. He asked on the group, if anyone wanted to be his study buddy. I replied privately that I would. There are guidelines for respectful communication. Even I know I was not supposed to text him. Can people tell something new? Anything original?