I'd love to share a few thoughts, though these pertain to life in general and not relationships persae, although it does have application there too.

When it comes to the sliver of 1% and the chunk of 99% something has already happened. At some point a decision has been made, putting "x" in the 1% and "y" in the 99%. The question would therefore be, what basis was used to decide the "good" from the "bad"? Is that basis still relevant? Is it real or perceived? Is it based on a belief system that could be challenged? Is it variable? Can some of the 99% be moved given a perspective change?

These sound like silly logical questions. Yet their profoundness is based in their simplicity. A great example is crying is bad and laughing is good. Whilst the mindset around this has changed in recent years, when did we decide that crying was "bad". When did we decide that kids crying when we are trying to do the shopping is bad? When did we decide that crying in public is embarrassing? And it's the same for so many things in life. We have belief systems in place which we then use to evaluate. Initial reactions would be a high paying job is viewed as better than a low paying job. Yet that is far from the truth based on many other factors. We see a person down the street driving a fancy car, we make the assumption they are doing well. Yet they could be in debt up to their eyeballs, with the person in the old clothes and shoes with holes in them may in fact have more savings and have a happier life.

The key to your post is "being able to see". IS it possible that the 1% is indeed 61% but the 60% is not visible to us? When I was learning about perceptions, feeling loved was a big one for me. I didn't think anyone would love me again. And so I went through many years feeling that no one would, could or would ever love me. I am still single. What I learnt though, is that the world has love in abundance. I had spent so long looking for it in one specific area, I didn't see it in so many others. The dog that wagged its tail at me when it walked by, the person at the supermarket that said hello, the person in the car that stopped so I could cross the road. The flower that was in bloom that I stopped to smell, the sunset that I saw last night.

Perception is projection. Man did it take a while for me to get my head around this. The way we percieve the world is how we project ourselves into the world. And we get more of that. So, I'm in a bad mood, im out and about trying to get things done, I'm in a rush, it's raining, the car is out of fuel, I forgot to put money in the parking meter and I just dropped the contents of my bag on the ground. Then a stranger across the road gives me a dirty look. How Dare He!!!!

Lets take that exact same scenario. This time, percieving a universe of gratitude and then projecting that appreciation forward. So, I'm in a good mood out and about endeavouring to get things done. Its awesome that I have time and get to go down the street, and have the opportunity to do some chores. The rain is glorious, I don't recall the last time I got to spend time in the rain, and the garden is going to love it. The smell of the fresh rain, the sound of the droplets, the sensation of the water hitting my face, and wow, look at how green that tree looks now that the dirt has washed off its leafage. I've spilled the contents of my bag and, oh thank you stranger for stopping to help me pick up my things. Hi how are you? The car is out of fuel, its fantastic that its parked in a safe place for now, and, that I have money in the bank to buy more. The parking meter still had some time in it. And my things, they will dry. Oh wow, that guy across the road who just looked at me, stubbing his toe like that on the kerb, that must have really hurt, I hope he's ok...

Life is all about belief systems and projections. We weren't born knowing grass is green and the sky is blue. Just like we weren't born "knowing" what is a "positive" experience and what is a "negative" one. They are beliefs systems we adopted, often taught by our parents, and or learnt through experience in life. Trouble is, we never challenge those beliefs. Those beliefs, those perceptions, are what we project into the world, and that is what we see.

Please don't take away from this that I am invalidating your feelings. Far from it. Rather, feelings, just like thoughts and beliefs do well to be challenged from time to time. Because imagine if the world is actually a better place than we think, and all we need to do is change our perception and what we "see".