I see how what I did was indirect and ineffective. I understand that it also comes across as manipulative, though that is not at all what I was doing. I didn’t directly ask for a call, so I didn’t expect a call. Those are the rules/frame/agreements/routines/rituals/etc. She chose to call. She broke our frame. I did not force her. She can put the blame on me, but in the end, she’s responsible for her actions.

I know I communicated extremely poorly. I have owned that since the beginning. With her, with myself, and on here. But I never meant to be threatening. And it hurts that she would associate that word with me in anyway. And she still thinks the word applies!