Well, nobody really notices anything is different until you say you are not coming to a monthly sunday/holiday dinner. Then its the 7 stages of grief. Mother even bargained that i could bring my friend that she denied an invitation to several years earlier, that i wasnt even close with anymore. I was like, why do you even invite me? She said and i quote, WE HAVE TO. Associating with the family required me to dissociate, and finally i just said no to them and yes to me.

I think mine is a special case. My mother was purposely neglectful towards me. My father and older brother picked up the slack somewhat, but attachment was completely lacking. I survived and only thrived as much as i did because I could get A's in school and was fairly cute.