i think part of the problem may lie in the fact that you're changing who YOU are - no one should have to change who they are in order to accommodate to someone else. The same thing can be said about him - "I don't see him changing to be the man i need." he's his own person too, and just as you shouldn't change who YOU are, one can't expect others to live their lives so they can fulfill their own needs or desires.

First and foremost, everyone is their own person. They have their own needs and desires, and if two people happen to meet and can live harmoniously together, then thats great. But i think the biggest problem with most people's relationships, is expecting their significant other to change, or trying to change themselves in order to please their partner.

What type of person do YOU want to be? How do you feel about YOURSELF?

You say others say you're "hot and thin"... does that make you feel better? Are you looking for other people's approval and is that why you feel unsatisfied with your husbands response?

The question you need to ask yourself is, how do YOU feel about yourself? Does what another person think of you dictate how you feel about yourself? Does the need of social approval (and approval from your husband) interfere with who you are intrinsically as a person?

I'm not trying to make you feel worse about the situation, but seriously think about how you'd answer these questions.

While i've been off in hiding these past couple of months i've been doing a lot of reading (in my not so spare time), and i've been asking myself these similar things.