Yeah. I don't get the difference. I don't feel defined by being in a cold environment if I say "I'm cold" vs "I experience a low temperature." I don't feel defined when I say "I'm hungry" instead of "I have hunger." Why should I feel defined saying "I'm bipolar" vs "I have bipolar" (which doesn't even make sense if you don't add the "disorder" word. I have bipolar what? magnetic semiconductors? transistors? membranes? motors? I know people get what you mean, but it just sounds awkward to me.)


Sorry, I got lectured on this like the first time I told someone, and I just don't get it, so now I'm oppositional when people suggest "I have hunger" is sooo much superior to "I'm hungry." It's literally just a verb change that doesn't change the meaning. Saying "I have an allergy to..." vs "I'm allergic to..." doesn't change the fact whoever is saying it gets a swollen tongue upon encounter. Changing a verb doesn't change whether I exhibit symptoms that affect my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors or not.

I'm hungry. I'm bipolar. I'm tired. I'm a blue-eyed, psychotic, oppositional, devil-advocating, glue-sniffing, fiddle-playing dumbass human-being (maybe on that last bit). ALL of that temporary because in the infinitesimal timeline of the universe, I'm here for hopefully not longer than I have to be. Does any of it solely define me? No. All of it affects me regardless of pro tem status though, but it's all a percentage. Some days bipolar affects 100% of my life. Some days 0%. Most days in between probably. Most days probably less than when I am hungry and tired.

I don't even like the term "bipolar" disorder, that's another topic but I'm already needlessly angrily rambling to get my mind off of corners. Two opposite poles. Who tf says mania and depression are opposites? What about mixed episodes--how is someone at two opposite places at the same time? That's not supposed to physically be possible at a macro-scale. What about people who only experience mania--"unipolar bipolar disorder"? Is this a mood issue or is my brain more of a type of magnet than others?


(I'm not even diagnosed with bipolar disorder, haha, I'm diagnosed with schizoaffective d/o-bipolar type and other shyt, so I can't even say "I have bipolar disorder" and be technically right anyways.)

TL/DR: I am bipolar as much as I am a pianist who needs a sandwich.

edit: I swear I'm not as obsessed as this post made it seem haha. Just bored I guess.