I hope you've developed a plan for getting out of a very bad marriage. You can do it. You've learned important lessons. Time to move on . . . or, at least, focus your attention in that direction. There's hope for you and your future. Your husband, in a way, is more unfortunate. He's learning nothing. I don't see much good in his future. He'll always treat women the way he's treating you. That's who he is. He'll never know real love.