No AG, I'm NOT saying you "choose" to be in the abyss, i'm saying you "choose" what to do with it. You "choose" to sit and wollow in it or you "choose" to get up and do something to comfort yourself....change the scenery, change your activity, get out of the house, get some fresh air, listen to upbeat music, move around a bit, get the blood flowing, get your mind moving in another direction....where the mind goes, the man follows. So find ways to think better thoughts....whatever that may be...I've made several suggestions to Angie above. But the "choice" of how you're going to handle this is yours. What you're going to "choose" to do with these emotions is yours. Nobody here has to be a victim of their illness....if you "choose" to be victim, then you've stripped yourself of any power to change your circumstances. But if you refuse to be a victim, you've taken that power back and you have "choices."

Hope that clears it up. TgrsPurr.