I don't really know. I am definitely "as safe as I can be" at least 60% of the time, but I'm not sure if this is a "majority rules" situation or more of a "the car's brakes work 60% of the time, so we should be good, right?.....right?" situation.


I have so much problem with answering "am I safe" in general. I have no clue what "safe" looks like. I don't think anyone is ever "safe" but there's a difference between a random event and losing control over your behavior. I've gotten through so much worse than this fine, but I've not fared so well when things weren't as bad. So I really don't know. Tuesday I might handle trigger after trigger no problem, but Wednesday I might learn how to make a noose because I realized the day before I forgot to get pickles when I went food shopping "and I'm such a useless failure who can't even remember f'ing pickles when I made a list."

I haven't killed myself or physically hurt anyone else so far, so if it were "yes or no or no ice cream" I'd say yes?