Not sure if I've ever talked about this here. Simplest way i can describe it is it's like a crush, but it doesn't have to be romantic. I have had several FPs in my life, and am apparently still susceptible to the "ailment". I say ailment, because it can be torture waiting for those good moments, like in my case, waiting to see or hear from that person. I get all sorts of nervous thinking they don't actually like me, thinking i must have messed up, even if or when it has nothi g to do with me, and but i still really like invest or want or almost need them to like me.

It's happening again. And I'm nervous waiting to hear from them (her). Does this make sense? I need help in not letting this nagging feeling of importance... just help me cope and forget. Either she's taking time to make a reply, forgot, or hates me. I would have maybe moved on already had she never messaged at all, but she did once, so now i half expe t it. I mean cuz i asked a question. SHE had asked a question, and i replied but i was so excited, it was a slightly lengthy reply, about the length of this message. So, i ****ed up didnt I? I don't know. Just hate caring so much now 😭