https://www.reddit.com/r/Enneagram8/..._angry_do_you/

https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/comme...t_weak_people/

“The person right now that I'm thinking of is a 6. She's taking my job over in a month, and I'm trying to transition her into it. She *knows* what she needs to do, and she's more than capable of it, but she acts all simpering and hesitant, asking everyone for approval when we're in meetings that she's supposed to be taking control of. Big fake smile on her face. Only answers questions with a yes or no, when usually she shoots her mouth off and you can't shut her up.

Arrrrgh.

We've talked about it more than once and she says, "I know, I know," but it doesn't change.

...She called me while I was writing this, and keeps talking to me about her "concerns" with the company. I said okay if you have concerns, what do you do about them. She said "nothing." ...She's now telling me all the reasons why they aren't *really* concerns, even though she called them concerns.

So, update on the rest of the call, which LASTED OVER AN HOUR. (Ugh, so inefficient.) She was, as suspected, talking around taking ownership of a few things. I told her that I worry because I care about the company, and I think those things still need to be done after I'm gone. She does a bunch of mental gymnastics to avoid talking about it. (TBF I think the avoidance method was unconcious.) I figure out she either can't or won't do those things (which are "intellectual labor" as opposed to assigned tasks) and talk to her about alternatives.

I move in to fix-it-mode. I say, after I'm gone I want to make sure someone's doing X Y and Z, and it's okay if the dynamic changes, so perhaps this is something you can lean on Manager1 and Manager2 on? She jumps on that. I explain the consequences of that, which is mainly losing control of a bunch of things (if someone wants details I can explain, but I'll spare you for now), and ding-ding-ding I realize I have to give that up, and of course things will change when I'm gone.

I also feel like they’re trying to emotionally manipulate me with all of their background info and sob stories. I get it, just tell me straight what you want.

It enrages me when people complain about their situation w/o doing anything about it or if they were the one to put themselves into it in the first place. As well as self depricate and let people walk all over them.“

I find it sickening when people are so unsympathetic to those that they deem “weak” and go screaming “omg shut up with your complaining and do something about it”. It’s absolutely disrespectful to those who have suffered with trauma and your lack of empathy is not helping at all.

They think they’re better because they’re “problem solvers” and if others don’t think like them, apparently they’re the problem. They don’t seem to understand that some of us have a much tougher time developing our own capabilities and struggle with our own confidence hence why we appear to fall behind.

We may also be struggling due to facing trauma at one point in our lives. Just because we look “weak” to you doesn’t mean we’re less human.