Quote:
Originally Posted by raspberrytorte
Weather was really nice today so my daughter and I took a rather pleasant walk to the store and back. I've been worried about her because we found out
, so we hid all the knives and scissors in the apartment. Her grades have also been slipping. Not quite sure what changed since last semester.
My book proofs came in the mail today, so I've been reading through those and finding formatting issues that were NOT on the file I uploaded from my computer. Covers look cool though. I'll figure it out.
I was taken off 4mg of clonazepam in TWO MONTHS by a moron psychiatrist in the past and then taken off 30mg of diazepam in TWO DAYS by a stupid IP psychiatrist, so no, I DO NOT trust psychiatrists to take me off slowly! The only one I would have trusted is my old psychiatrist who retired, but when I asked him he told me I needed it because my anxiety was severe and he didn't want to take me off it.
I'm so dependent on stupid diazepam and gabapentin I forgot to take my afternoon doses and couldn't figure out why my hands were shaky and why I was so anxious all afternoon and evening until I went to take my night meds and saw I'd forgotten to take them.
I'm so fudging pissed. I don't know WHY I allowed myself to get into this situation again! After my clonazepam experience I swore I wouldn't touch a benzo again and here I am... again... stuck. And facing another nightmare withdrawal where I'll probably cry a few times like last time.
I know. I know. BOOHOO. Deal with it, raspberry. |
How old is your daughter again? I started SH-ing at 12 (obviously that became a problem), but a lot of other people tried it and didn't really develop a huge problem.
Do you think your pdoc would be "on board" with decreasing your diazepam dose? My doc didn't want me off diazepam, but I was only taking it for haldol side effects and wasn't even on haldol at that point. I was taking 15mg 3x a day and just asked to switch to 15/10/15 (just lower the noon dose by 5mg) for a bit, got adjusted, and then asked to go to 10/10/15, and just kinda went by whatever my body was okay with. I don't remember exactly, but I think I ended up going to 10/5/15. I wanted to lower the night dose last because I didn't want to get insomnia and get manic. These were massive jumps for tapering off (Ashton manual says to go down by 2mg b/t 40mg and 14mg), but I didn't want to have a million different doses of diazepam or take a bunch of pills to get the 15mg.
Sneaky self-taper I guess (I've done that with APs too when I knew cold turkey would be what they do but wouldn't feel too great). I'm really only recommending that if your pdoc truly won't taper you off slowly keeping in mind the end goal of being benzo-free.
I do understand having a pdoc that doesn't really understand meds have bad withdrawals (the antipsychotic withdrawal is, even in doc's that know benzo withdrawal can be hell, not talked about enough imo).