I’m trying hard to keep it together but I can feel all my friends pulling away. Even the one of 20 years who is a therapist and who used to research psych meds! I had hoped he’d understand but apparently not. My case manager just says to wait for the Vraylar to kick in but yet I still feel manic in the mean time. Then there’s my friend who will talk on the phone with me for hours but won’t come see me in person like he used to. Then there’s my only people who seem to tolerate me like this are N3 and the church choir members. I’m spinning my wheels. Trying hard to be productive. Cleaning my apartment from the month+ of neglect a little every day.