When you are in a relationship with a toxic/disordered person that person manipulated you into thinking whatever is wrong is your fault. This is especially true when the person is an alcoholic/addict. This is not anything you can fix but they manipulate you into believing that you can and you were completely devoted to that mindset.

It was good that she moved out so you could slowly see the reality. I see you getting stronger and healthier. This is important so you see the red flags so you don’t end up repeating the same pattern with someone else. Toxic people tend to pick people that have self doubt. They manipulate that self doubt to take advantage and control.