My Support Forums - View Single Post - Bipolar Check-in #88 (again!)

LadyShadow · Mar 29, 2025, 03:18 PM

The past few days have been incredible. It has been between 70-80 degrees all the days, and I have been spending a lot of the time outside. I have been pushing myself to leave the house, so I don't sit around waiting for emails. It's been the bane of my existence. One miracle happened Thursday where he actually unblocked me, and we talked for two hours. All I heard was the uncertainty in his voice, and how much he is NOT ready to be with anyone right now. There is a lot going on in his life, as well as mine. So, we're back to emails again, but it doesn't stop the love I feel for him - I have come to the conclusion that the path toward God that I am on is what is planned for me. My faith and this path to join my church, and the Legions of Mary, is what I am intended to do.

My heart is lonely, yes, it is. The loneliness is overwhelming sometimes, and every time I pray, I tend to cry. But I am learning all about sacrifice and what I am meant to do. I am in no position to date; I am a total wreck. This path that I am on is leading me to my purpose, and I firmly believe things are the way with my ex on purpose to bring me to where I am supposed to be. It will take time to figure all of this out.

@Moose72 - I know firsthand what mania can do. Being deeply spiritual and being manic, are really fine lines. I hope your pdoc can help.

Today's beautiful weather prompted me to get all dressed up. I got a lot of compliments at the meeting. I hope everyone is having a wonderful Saturday!!