I just feel really sick but I see my GI at like 9:30 in the morning. I'm lucky I can get in whenever I need to basically and I don't have to wait months. If she needs to do an endoscopy she'll probably do it this week.

But I just slept all day. Idk why. I dreamt I was chewing on a really good piece of gum. But when I woke up I didn't have any gum. I didn't eat dinner and I don't have headphones. So I'm just kinda lying here.

I'm not really sure what a brain zap feels lIke but my head sometimes feels like flashes of lighting or something goes through it. Its weird.

I have a pdoc appointment tommorow too but doesn't need to do anything. I'm not going to tell him.about the heart disease because if he takes me off my Geodon I am ****ed. The prestiq is one thing. But I can't go without my Geodon and all other AP cause massive weight gain and I'm supposed to be losing weight.

I finally caved in and took 2 Benadryl because my eyes have been itching and watering for awhile and today has been especially bad

I wish things were how they were a week ago but like I think I'm just way more tired now then I was a week ago. Idk. I feel like they are pandemic different. Maybe ita just dissocoiation ****. I know theres depersonalization too. I had that in October 2015. I felt like my world wasn't real.

I feel all itchy like stuff ia crawling on me and I don't have my music to block out the noises I'm hearing. My bed is way too uncomfortable.