My Support Forums - View Single Post - Bipolar Check-in #88 (again!)

LadyShadow · Apr 30, 2025, 04:41 PM

I am so sorry @Nammu that all that happened over your package. I mean the lady was just being nice to bring it to you. I don't know why people have to insert themselves and upset other people. I can understand why you play games less now. Was it resolved? Is the lady who got really upset okay now? I am really sorry to hear that.

I am doing the best I can under the circumstances. I can only see my therapist once a month, now with my rent increase and the money I owe NY State plus all my other bills, I just can't afford $45 a visit. Plsu he won't help anyway, because my mind is pretty much made up.

I have come to the conclusion that I am not only a horrible codependent, but a straight up masochist . I do things constantly that hurt me, and cry about them afterwards. I have no way of changing this, or no hope getting help for it. The only thing that keeps me going is my faith, which I am trying really hard to hold onto. My work with the church is very gratifying, I just wish I could do more for them. I wish there was more things I could do in my community to help. I wish I could find a job that was meanighful that won't upset my benefits. All I am coming against are dead-ends. Then when I think about it, I should just shut up and stop complaining and be grateful for what I have. Ugh, it all feels so painful.