It’s common for someone with “Developmental Trauma Disorder” or “CPTSD” (neither consistently recognized as “real” conditions) to have 4, 5,6+ different diagnoses.

I supposedly have a significant trauma and neglect background, and have collected “BPD, bipolar, PTSD, ADHD, (right now anorexia but at sometimes better is described as bulimia or an unspecified eating disorder), and substance use disorder.” They’ve tried in the past going with a more schizo dx than bipolar, but dropped that, and once tried to pin me with DID. (Also was arrested once and told AsPD, but I feel and attach too much for that shyt to possibly he true. Maybe traits, but no, man, my cluster B is 100% BPD)

Read any book on trauma or the complex trauma center of Boston’s website and you can easily see someone who wasn’t loved or protected properly as a child meeting any of those “label criteria” in the 15 minutes they talk to their psychiatrist years down the line every so often after trying to hold things together forever.

If someone like myself has such “muddy waters” as my pdoc in the hospital put it, where do they begin with treatment? I was just inpatient, and it seems like unless you travel thousands of miles to some trauma treatment resort and spend the rest of your life in debt from it, they don’t like to touch anything PTSD-ish. Unless you have a BMI of 15 and a resting heart rate of 45 or are medically 100% fine (or go in debt doing residential in between IP and PHP) there’s no outside help (I’ve ever found anyway) for eating disorders. If you have both and manage to get treatment, there really isnt a place that truly addresses both (even if they’re very much connected). I consider my BPD a kind of trauma/stressor related disorder (even if DSM doesnt) because it 100% comes from an inconsistent and chaotic upbringing, so say I manage to find somewhere to help me eat AND manage flashbacks, are they at all likely to help with splitting, chronic feelings of emptiness, extreme dissociation/ psychosis under stressor or develop a stable sense of self? No. And if I get “manic” they’d likely see me at an early stage if hypomania where its fun and games and say I’m cured only for me to spend the next week’s nights wandering the city yelling at the caterpillars trying to infiltrate Market Basket’s upper management and then crying in a cop car about how a sea turtle wouldn’t stay an alligator or some random bizarre shyt like that. And if the ADHD symptoms aren’t addressed it’s not like I’ll let groups be productive for anyone, at least not the way the counselors intended anyway.

But it’s “Cambridge eating disorders clinic” to force you to eat, “so and so trauma center” that pri a ly has a bunch if EMDR therapists, or trying to find a DBT group to manage “BPD,” and if your pdoc catches you at the wrong moment they’ll try to add some heavy meds you MAY or MAY NOT truly need.

when they all probably are just signs you never learned to be a proper human when most people do instead of all these separate”disorders.”

The system is deeply flawed when it comes to people who COULD be diagnosed with (and treated for!) DTD or CPTSD instead of having 5 diagnoses and your doc saying “which needs work most now?”

I dont fking know doc! I hallucinate because I don’t sleep because I have nightmares and I’m depressed because I’m alone because I’m distrustful and angry all the time. But then someone says something sweet and I am over the moon for three hours until the tone in one text they sent doesn’t match the rest and then I’m researching best OTC meds to die quickest with, swearing to never eat again while hours later purging half a box of Lucky Charms, and I feel like the dumbest genius on this planet, and the most empathetic psychopath, and the most authentic actor and the loneliest life of the party. Someone says they love me ina most authentic fashion and I’m trained that they’re going to set me up for something not up my alley later, someone says “I’m gonna kill you” and I hear wedding bells. Tell me, doc, which diagnonsense is ruling me right now????! What treatment do YOU suggest?

Fk traditional treatment, just put me in a medical coma for a few years and wake me up when YOU get grandiose enough yourself to think you have an an answer. Depending on how far gone you go, you might be on to something by then. Until then, shove the Zyprexa where the sun don’t shine and sprinkle legos all along the path between your bed and the bathroom every night you have too much to drink before bedtime.