My life didn't turn out the way I envisioned it either. I was set up for success: high school valedictorian, graduated summa cum laude from a good university in a rigorous degree path, got an M.S. in Cell & Molecular Biology. But during college, the ED reared its head and then came depression and bipolar mania though. Despite bipolar, I made it through college and grad school and even ended up meeting H and getting married (which some part of me had thought I'd never meet a man I'd want to marry). I got pregnant and had a daughter, but then the cracks really began to show postpartum, and I had to get on psych meds and then more serious psych meds and then finally was actually diagnosed with bipolar. I tried working 3 times but never lasted longer than a month at any job before having a major breakdown. Finally, I ended up a homemaker and stay-at-home mom.

I always thought I'd have a fantastic career but it never happened. For a long time, I felt a complete failure at the career aspect of my life especially. But I am glad I got to stay home with my daughter and she never had to go to daycare. She's a bit different type of kid, not autistic but just at the edge of the spectrum and many things took extra patience with her (which I tried my best, but face it, I definitely wasn't perfect either). And I was able to help her with her homework in elementary school, go to all her school functions and awards before she started online school (with the COVID outbreak).

I definitely feel I failed the potential I had when I first graduated high school. On the other hand, I am so proud of the young woman my daughter has grown up to become, and I know I was a big part of that, a bigger part perhaps than I would have been had I had a career. I have a husband and a good marriage, and I never thought that would happen either.