I'm sorry to read what you’ve been going through, it sounds like it’s been an incredibly long and painful journey. I just wanted to chime in and say I relate to a lot of what you’re describing, especially that wired-but-tired feeling and the constant state of worry.

Like some others here, I’ve tried a bunch of things with mixed results. One thing that’s been somewhat helpful for me recently has been delta 8 gummies for sleep before bed. I know everyone responds differently, but I noticed they helped take the edge off mentally without that heavy "knocked out" feeling. Again, definitely worth being cautious and maybe checking in with someone you trust if you decide to try it.

Also, I second what Cherry said, 10mg of melatonin might be way too much. I’ve read that our bodies can become desensitized to it with higher doses, and sometimes less is more