Hmmm I see. But let’s say someone has indeed been violated sexually but they brushed it off and lived normally weren’t they still abused? Shouldn’t we put into account the abuser’s side of things and not just how their actions were perceived for the definition to be realized fully? And abuse is broadly speaking ‘misuse’ in a way. So I do put the misuse label on the actions of mom and my brother but I don’t know their intentions, so is intention part of it? I still feel bad from what they did, so given that what they did is inappropriate and if that inappropriate misuse lead to damage then we can say this is was abuse? If we can call it abuse, but we don’t know if they had sexual intention, then can we call it sexual abuse? I suppose so because that’s where the damage I have was directed.

Sorry I’m all over the place. I’m just really trying to wrap my head around things. My last therapy session really unleashed the clown in the box. Which is good, of course.