Okay, I ended up taking some valium. I got yesterday and today's meds on Wednesday for the holiday and the med nurse not working Fridays, and I got approved to get tomorrow's today so I can do this volunteer day thing,
But I do feel better now. Well, I did until I texted my mom asking her if she's going grocery shopping tomorrow and if she'd let me stay the night but then decided that was a bad idea because I'd miss volunteer day at the park and she said to make a list and she'd pick stuff up for me, but I also feel like that's a bad idea because she's kinda dumb and will get the wrong shyt and I'll freak tf out when
So, yeah, just gonna wait until Monday and go on my own and take the bus back. That way I get the cheap prices of MB and will see what's on sale, choose exactly what I want, don't deal with crowds, and I don't have to see my mom/she doesn't have any chance of touching my food. If the weather's nice I can walk there and just take a leisurely bus ride back too.

Of course when I tried calling her back to not come over, she was out of the service range.

I don't think I'm even going to volunteer tomorrow honestly. Registration is at 8:30am and that's like a 40 minute walk away and I don't know how long it'll take and they don't specify what we're doing (I mean, trail maintenance, but when I did "trail maintenance" that was at a rural park where our job was to remove invasive plant species, pick up any litter, repair water bars, remove rocks that are easily moved but big enough to be a safety hazard, stuff like that. ONE OF the many entrances to this park that's pretty much in the middle of the city has more incredibly messy homeless camps than my apartment building has tenants so I have a feeling clean up will look a little different).