My Support Forums - View Single Post - Bipolar check-in thread #90

LadyShadow · Jun 26, 2025, 12:06 AM

Happy birthday to me! I am officially 45 years old, holy age crisis batman, lol.

The past few hours have been crazy. Just the wildest weather I have ever seen here, it's due because of all this heat the past few days. My power went out and on like three times, and the thunder was just shaking everything! I have been just writing non-stop; I am finally getting somewhere in my book that I have been meaning to write for years. I am just writing all kinds of things, and I am so happy I finally have inspiration now. The guy from interpals messaged me again, he is really nice, it sparked some hope in me, but not too much, it's just friendly and casual.

But the real revelation is how I feel about my ex - I am coming to terms where we are and what we are, As much as love lives within me, he moved on from me, I met him in a desperate lonely place, and when I went manic and we were apart, he found himself again and made plans for a future, without me. In all the pain and grief of that realization, I started to write and do things again, but the memories flooded in and haunted me. There is a letter he sent me last year for my birthday that was filled with cinematic all-consuming love - that in my loneliest hour before my birthday tonight, I left it on his voicemail, an echo of the love he once had for me,

Then the thunder clapped outside, scaring me and almost knocking out power - and in the most unexpected twist, he called, just in time for midnight, and a special happy birthday wish,

Whatever I thought I was doing, waiting around for emails, hour-long phone calls, it was holding on to something that has long gone,

Today is my birthday, and I am going to celebrate in wonderful, blissful solitude with my new Star Wars novels turning off all the devices, TVs and computers, then, go to dinner with my very pregnant best friend, Hope everyone has a great day!