My Support Forums - View Single Post - Senile PDOC, or just abusive and controlling?

Simcha · Jun 26, 2008, 07:47 PM

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Hello all.
I really like this forum that I found. You are all very supportive and welcoming here. I'm sorry if this seems long, but I can't shorten it and get the same story through.

PDOC is older than 80, which is relevant to the story. It was my third (and last) visit with this PDOC, the first one being intake, and the second being followup, which was months ago. The PDOC never prescribed anything, as in our 2nd appointment, which was over a month later, my panic attacks went away and I only returned at the PDOC's request.
My remission of the panic attacks is from the work I do with my T. Fortunately, I have an excellent T. Needless to say, he was appalled and shocked himself.

PDOC asked some detailed questions about what I was seeing him for that day... I told him because since I was returning to work, I wanted to keep my anxiety at bay, and my T had recommended that I talk to him about a low dose of anti-anxiety meds so that my anxiety/panic attacks doesn't flare up again. PDOC asked me about the asthma that I have--

"Does it hurt/more difficult to breathe in, or out?" I told him "I don't know, it doesn't hurt, per se. Sometimes more difficult to breathe in, sometimes out, it depends on the severity constriction..." PDOC said to me in an annoyed voice "That doesn't sound like asthma to me; you should have more problems breathing OUT... I don't think that's asthma. "
This was very annoying to me, because I had been through hell recently with attacks that required 3 ER visits, so the last thing I needed was for my PDOC to attack me, attempting to invalidate my asthma diagnosis, implying that it was all in my mind and ignoring what I was telling him the problems were. My response was that I had been diagnosed by both my pulmonologist and my allergist, and I had recently had several asthma attacks.
PDOC even started turning red with anger, fuming...it was almost scary even...
PDOC went on to tell me that he thought that the stimulant I take for ADHD was too high (different doctor prescribed the stimulant), and he also went on to tell me that the stimulant was the cause of my anxiety and/or panic attacks. This was an area that PDOC and I had discussed before, both on the first and second visit. As I told him at the first appointment, I have taken the stimulant at the same dose for an entire YEAR PRIOR to having any anxiety problems or panic attacks. I also told him that I knew the EXACT SOURCES of my anxiety and panic attacks, which I discuss weekly with my T, and I have had good results with my T.

I went on to tell him that he can contact my T if he doesn't believe me, but I have very good results with the stimulant, and like many with ADHD who take a stimulant, it actually makes me CALMER (my thoughts don't race, I am able to focus, less fidgety, less hyper, etc.).
PDOC said "How do you KNOW the stimulant isn't causing the panic attacks/ anxiety?!!!!??? I believe I do know a thing or two more than you do, and I think I'm qualified to know the difference!!!!."
Meanwhile, I'm sitting there very calmly in my chair, trying to process what the hell happened that my PDOC would freak out on me.
PDOC then accused me, in his own words of "telling him what to do" and repeated the bit about knowing more than I do as evidence that he must be correct about the stimulant (in the same accusatory, hostile manner of course).

My shocked response, while sitting calmly and speaking calmly was "What? I in no way told you what to do, what on earth are you talking about? I was just answering your question. You can speak with my T if you don't believe me."
I told him that I agree that in some people and at some doses, stimulants CAN make peoples anxiety worse, but that isn't the case with me.

I also told him how I had tried an immediate release formulation of a stimulant before that caused a really fast heart rate and added to my anxiety a few months ago, but I stopped it because of the fast heart rate and lack of response to the ADHD symptoms, just to prove to him I wasn't some sort of an addict to the ADHD medication (which is what I think he was getting at).
FYI----I did not respond in kind, and even though I was very annoyed and confused with his behavior, actually---absolutely in SHOCK and DISBELIEF at what was occurring and how I was being spoken to... I did NOT behave the same way he did.
PDOC got up from his chair, and said "Well now, I don't think I can be seeing you as this isn't appropriate, I will NOT be having you telling me what to do!! I am not going to provide the treatment you want, and I'm not just going to do things your way!!! I think you'd better leave!!!"

So yes, I took him up on his "offer" to leave, and I up and sped out of there as fast as I possibly could while he yelled after me that he wasn't going to bill me.
My thoughts were immediately that he had dementia. I've worked with elderly persons with dementia in a professional capacity, and that is exactly what it reminded me of. I cannot think of anything else that would change the personality like that, with exception of some type of Alzheimer's. Thoughts anyone? Anyone else have any horror story PDOC or T stories that are similar? I've never heard of something like this before... I don't even know what to do about it, if anything.
I'm definitely not going to forget this anytime soon, and I don't think I'll be seeing any other PDOCS in the future either. </font> </font>