I would guess that she wants treatment targets - but I guess it is hard to know for sure.

You kind of did provide an answer here. Could you start with that and see how she finds that? If she starts to try and operationalize it / manipulate it into a form she feels she can deal with then could you have a back-up list of things to work on to pull out in that kind of situation?

It would just be about coaxing what you have said already into a form she might find more manageable...

For example: It sounds like you are pretty focused on IMPROVING your functioning (so don't want anything regressive). CBT is pretty good for being on board with that :-) So... To build on (reinforce and elaborate) on your strengths rather than trying to pull apart your defenses. What are the things that you struggle the most with now that you would like to improve on? E.g., you said you want to be 'better in the future than I am right now' - so if you look at the things you want to be able to do but don't feel you can do now then that might be a place to start.

It sounds like maybe some of your past clinicians weren't so CBT focused? That might have been what she was getting at with asking about your past experiences...