It’s not necessarily true that you can’t find a partner if you are paying alimony. Ton of people date and have relationships with men and women who are paying child or spousal support, it’s not unusual. I think because you were married to a lazy money grabber, you might feel all women are after money. Not the case. There’s more to life than money

Also the only time people might pay spousal support for life is if their ex spouse is severely disabled. Typically there’s time limit.

Also they would have to take in consideration that she hasn’t paid child support and you are a sole provider for a child

You only have to facilitate contacts with minor children. No court will demand you do that for adults. Is only one kid still a minor?

Just document every phone call and email and every interaction. At some point if children refuse contact, no one can force it. Just keep good documentation