In my career/job, I am in a state of limbo. I am having trouble mustering up the energy for a full fledged job search and application process. At the same time, my company is so dysfunctional, that I want to leave sooner than later, but I can't seem to pour my energy into job searching.

A part of me enjoys the cushiness of my current role. And a large part of me is enjoying the stability that a steady job brings into my life.

My life was in upheaval for 7 years, until I landed this job two years ago. I was laid off from 3 jobs in 7 years, which caused a ton of stress.

I need stability in my life, and that whole time the only stable thing I had was my home because my marriage was troubled.

So, I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place, unable to move forward, but not wanting to stay where I am.

The other added factor is I am not ready to lead or manage people, and I am at a point in my career where I could be a Director. But I don't want that.

I also don't want to be doing all the heavy lifting in my next role. I outsource the heavy lifting now to agency partners, so I simply just direct the strategy and workflows internally.

I read somewhere that if you're unsure of the next step, then do nothing. Sit with the uncertainty until things become clear.

So, I am passively looking for work. I check job listings periodically, and I poke around. If I see something of interest, I will apply. But that's the most energy I can commit to this process right now.

Plus, it's summer and I feel like summer is a time to relax and unwind. Put up your feet and enjoy the summer days outdoors.

Of course, last night I was in bed by 6 PM. I don't know why, except that I was sick of being on the couch and it was too hot to be outside. So I went to bed and watched Seinfeld until I fell asleep around 10 pm. Oh well, it's what I chose to do!

Still, I am a bit frustrated by this limbo state.