Stability is the name of the game in my new life. I am enjoying stability. Most importantly, I am enjoying the peacefulness of my life. I have gotten rid of many toxic people, I am sidestepping newer toxic friendships, and I am attracting healthier ones.

Today is a brand new day, full of promise and hope. I am optimistic about the future.

I told the new guy that I am not quite on the same page as him, meaning, I am not quite feeling the feeling of falling in love, and that I need to take the relationship at a slow pace and one I am comfortable with. Even so, he seems to be falling harder for me each day, and I don't know how to react or how to respond.

I don't feel the same way right now. It's only been a few weeks so far. I am wondering if he is in a needier place than I am emotionally.

I also noticed in photos we've taken that he doesn't smile. And I noticed that when we're together and hanging out that he doesn't smile a lot, yet he comments on how much I smile. Maybe he's more serious than I am. Maybe I smile to cover up my pain when I talk about certain things in my past, like my marriage.

I have more questions than answers. I don't know yet how I feel about him, but I am willing to remain open-hearted and see where it goes.

He seems to be a good man, but I am still on alert and I am still wondering if he may be a bit controlling. I want to get to know him better and see if any behaviors show this.