So, what did you think in the two days at the motel? I don't think you can change your husband; sounds like you're trying to do too much yourself. Cut back your business so you can manage it more easily and so it's profitable again. It doesn't sound like you use the "toys" very much anyway, sell some of them. Get your priorities (your own health and happiness) straight and let other people worry about their own lives and happiness.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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