im feeling overwhelmed. i have so much to leanr and feel the new kid in school role so huge right now at work. i work 8;30-4:30 and get lunch for free from the kithcen there. its a rehab/recovery center. at least its healthy food and i dont get sick like when i was in IP years ago bc all their food was fried. overall things are gogin well but im still training. its exhausting. i called to end SSDI. i make too much and work too much and its time. im grateful for the little bit of financial secuirity i had all thise years before getting a good job. no shame to be on SSDI when you need it.

to be honest the trainings on domestic violence are bringing up feelings from my trauma of my childhood. i need to see my t. i cant for another month until i get paid bc i wont have insurance for 90 days and he doesnt accept my new insurance. he did say hed see me for a smaller fee of $150 instead of $175 so im gonna see him monthly once i start getting paid. its alot to handle right now on my own without his support.

through work i am getting DBT certifiied through marsha linehans psychwire program/. the whole center is dbt based whihc i love!! im excited to revisit the skills. overall im ok. certainly sleeping again as i started taking higher dose of melatonin and been staring at a computer screen for 4 days!!!