if losing 7 more pounds is what it will take to get you help, think about this for a second. What will happen when they want you to gain back those 7 lbs? Wouldn't it be a little bit easier for you to get help NOW and have less weight to gain or maybe even be able to stay where you are now? I don't know how much you weigh or how tall you are or your BMI, so I don't know how safe or healthy or unhealthy you are right now. But your mind is in very, very bad shape and to be so adamant that you do not want your doctor to change your mind is only going to make you sicker. I understand though because when I was 18 and I was hospitalized for three months, I went in feeling the same way you do. And it was not easy to turn that thinking around but the first step is trusting someone enough to help you let it go and having that person there beside you as a safety net. My therapist was wonderful and saved my life. I didn't just want to get skinny, I was willing to die to stay skinny. And I almost did.
Now I am relapsing and I am seeking help before I reach that point again. I never want to go all the way back there. I am worried about you.