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nonightowl · Aug 16, 2025, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fairy Fountain

snip: I have been watching videos about people in Japan who are described as hikikomori. People who isolate themselves after facing difficulties with anxiety, depression etc.

Over there, and in other Asian cultures, mental health is stigmatized, more so than it is here. I think that sucks, because our health isn't just physical, it's MENTAL too. Mental health care isn't a priority in the US, even during Covid lockdowns. They just talked about the physical, such as wearing a mask, washing your hands, staying home, etc. But nothing about coping with staying home, esp. if alone. Keeping busy doesn't work for everyone, and everyone doesn't work at home! The government was so presumptuous and still is.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fairy Fountain

snip: What's funny is that focusing on my own interests, and finding comfort in this solitude, has helped me a lot more than any of the advice I was given from therapists or doctors. I focus on my hobbies and I've been trying to stay healthy. Is this wrong? I was always made to feel wrong for preferring to remain a recluse. I guess I just stopped caring after being treated like I was inadequate for so long.

I had an acquaintance who is happy being a loner. She once did all the things she was "supposed" to do, like meet people, get married, have kids, etc. But it didn't make her happy and it's not her. Except for her kids, none of it worked out for her.

There's pressure in our culture to conform, to be like everyone else. I feel like single people don't even exist, since the media constantly talks about families. And shows pictures of smiling couples and families. I can't even LOOK at the screen when that comes up. Is that what my life is supposed to look like? Well, it doesn't. And that doesn't break any laws.

If you're okay with what you're doing, and it doesn't harm anyone, why should anyone care?

There's always signs or ads, "Bring a friend" or "Bring your family and friends", they assume everyone has that or should, and all it does is exacerbate my loneliness. The guy above me who thankfully moved out always had guests. I could hear extra footsteps, and they would stay the night often for days. How can someone know that many people?

The walls are very thin here and I can hear my neighbors talking and laughing.

Personally I'm not a loner and don't want to be, but if it works for you whose business is it? Nobody's! You're being you, that's better than trying to fit into some mold. There's nothing wrong with you, it's them. People suck.