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Old Yesterday, 11:47 PM
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JaneOnceMore JaneOnceMore is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2023
Location: Ontario; long-time member, just under other names
Posts: 817
Thanks @Nammu and @LadyShadow for the support re building drama. It really is intense living on top of one another and my building has 30 floors and 220 homes. Again, tho, as i found with breaking up with my one close neighbor of 12 years ("L"), it's actually a relief and less work to withdraw from someone than it is to maintain contact. I feel very liberated from L and i'm sure if i withdraw from the dog park and toilet my dog on the lawn and sit with her on an isolated garden bench i will find that liberating too. I've texted F that i don't want to be involved so she's on notice not to talk to me about the nonsense also.

Just feeling sad about all the changes i've made to my home recently. After twenty years i've finally accepted that my little home the size of a phone booth is just not big enough to have guests, not even one guest. Even with one other person in here i start to feel claustrophobic very quickly.

I've gotten rid of a sofa with chaise lounge, an overstuffed accent chair, and a coffee table. I have one comfy rocker. In perhaps the saddest and most telling decision of my life, i got rid of my double bed and replaced it with a single rollaway cot with not even room for my dog to sleep with me. She sleeps on a blankie on the floor.

My behavior socially demonstrates indecision regarding finding a partner but my behavior regarding the set-up of my home clearly shows that i have lost all hope. Actually my decision to buy a 450 square foot home twenty years ago demonstrated my commitment to living single. All this time, fooling around with escapades in dating, wretched misadventures in online dating, all this time, at some level i am not in contact with, my decision was made.

Last edited by JaneOnceMore; Today at 12:10 AM.
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BeyondtheRainbow, Crazy Hitch, gary290, LadyShadow, Nammu, raspberrytorte