sashagirl,

I know how overwhelming this is. At this time, it is so important to find people who are safe to talk to and to keep talking, even if you only express your feelings and memories here. For me, this is a very valuable place, but I also get a lot from talking to friends and counselors in person about what I have experienced and how it affects me now. At first, it may be hard to figure out who you can talk to in your life, but try to find at least one person to start with. In time, you will find more.

The worst thing to do to yourself right now is to try to ignore the feelings and the memories. No more bottling up. You must express what you are going through in order to heal. This can be a very painful and scary time, so remind yourself regularly that you can keep yourself safe now no matter what feelings come with the memories.

You were courageous even to open up here. Keep giving yourself credit when you take these steps. And always know that you are not alone in dealing with what is coming up in your mind and in your emotions.

be well,

mtd