I'm so sorry what everyone in this thread is going through right now. i don't have any wisdom. I'm going through the same thing... it's so hard to not only process losing your parents... but also try and wrap up decades of abuse with the same effort.

I wish I had more to offer. Just hugs.

For what it's worth, my grandmother died of lung cancer after being dx'd with COPD. The hardest thing for me was to watch her children SMOKE in the same room. I was humiliated when they went outside to smoke at the funeral home. I just can't understand. It makes no sense.

Then again, I'm fat and lots of people die from complications of obesity...

Good luck wiht it all.