I haven't really been very stable lately... been really triggery, really switchy... things with me and my alts haven't been good.

I have an alt, Fox, who's a kid, he's a little... but I don't know where the adults are. I mean there's me, but I feel 'alone' in my system almost, the others never co-operate with the note system I tried to set up to communicate... only Fox does.I try to improve communication between all of us but it's hard. I was thinking of buying a bunch of notebooks, like maybe each of us could have a notebook, and I'd print out a picture of their name and stick it on, or just get one big notebook.

He tries to get me to take my medication, not resort to self-destructive habits, it's like he's the alt who is guarding and protecting everyone in the system. He tries to get me to eat when I won't, he even writes shopping lists for stuff other alts want and for food he says I should eat.

I don't get it... he's a kid. It's not his role. He still draws triggery drawings sometimes, writes on my arms and doodles on the wall, but it's as if he's trying to take care of everyone. The two strongest, oldest alts have been really freaked by recent events and don't come out as often... I guess Fox has stepped up to help... but he's just a kid... it's worrying.

I know I'm not great with him. I lose my temper sometimes and break toys because I get frustrated and he can act really immature sometimes... I know he's just a kid... but sometimes it's like he's a protector.

I don't know if this is good or bad or what to think. I have a kid trying to look out for all of us.