For years I blamed myself for a couple of reasons. 1 it was easier to deal with I never had to look at the true nature of what had happened to me and the fact that the people who should have loved me didn't. 2. I really thought it was my fault because that is what they tell you. And if you tried to tell they would tell every one I was crazy and made most of this up. So I guess what im saying is that taking the blame is a sort of denial but it is also old ideas that we are trying to change. Either way they were survival skills that enabled us to survive but we don't have to survivie now. No one deserves to be abused no matter where you go. People have free will and some like to hurt people that is their guilt not ours we did nothing wrong.