I have tried to give him an ultimatum. I've told her he need to choose me and our life together or her. He can't have both. He says he wants to be with me but that he can talk to her about things and she will listen. I mean she is just a kid. In my opinion she sees him as challenge. She is definately not worth ending our marriage over but I don't want to have to compete for my own husband. We have our first marriage counseling appointment on Wednesday, but I'm not sure what it will be like or if it will even help.